Why You Need to Move on in Order to Move Forward
Most adults don’t desire or expect a Disney-like fairy-tale relationship, but all human beings should seek out partners who genuinely understand them and truly care for them. Relationship pains are inevitable, but they should never be or become the status quo. It’s usually at least a little frightening to picture being single for a long period of time, but it is possible to be happy single, and doing so could be exactly what you need to do in order to find someone who actually gives a shit about you long-term.
It’s always worth it to remain single until you’ve found a partner you can depend on and rely on. Love is much more than simply calling, texting, or spending time together because that’s what expected—or because that’s what required in order to continue getting laid. You can’t be selfless unless you do things to help other people without desiring anything in return, and a person doesn’t really love their partner if they perceive the relationship as a trade or a transaction. However, sometimes it can be difficult to know precisely the type of partner you have, or to know precisely what kind of person any human being really is. If a person genuinely enjoys spending time with their partner and their partners family and friends, it’s a good sign their love could be true. If the opposite is the case, it’s a strong sign to the contrary.
If your partner is pushy or obsessive, it’s difficult to imagine that they could honestly love you. Relationships are largely about support and care, especially when it comes to romantic relationships. An individual who pushes their partner rather than supporting them does not truly care about their feelings or their dignity, just as an individual who encroaches on their partner’s boundaries as opposed to allowing them the personal space they need does not truly love them. What’s more, a partner who actually gives a shit about you will try as best they can to ease both your self-doubt and your internal pain—even if the task itself seems hopeless.
There is no good reason for anyone to stay in a relationship with a partner who can’t make them happy in the present and in the future, or who doesn’t genuinely want to put forth time and effort to try to do so. Again, it’s frequently quite difficult to know for sure in some scenarios, but judging the truth becomes easier if you take time to contemplate who you really are as a person, what you really want in life, and who you want to become in order to have it all. If you’re ever with a partner who you realize is hindering your progress instead of helping it, it’s safe to say they don’t actually give a shit about you—at least when it comes to love.
Keep in mind that every break-up creates the opportunity for a partner who is better, and for a relationship that is better. Yet, don’t forget that each break-up is also an opportunity to get to know yourself better, and to make yourself better. Regardless, remember that your self, your desires, and your relationships are just that—yours. A person cannot force happiness or love by forcing themselves to conform to the expectations of a partner who doesn’t actually give a shit about them. As such, it’s always more positive, productive, and beneficial to be alone until you find someone who actually gives a shit about you. Period.